Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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