I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
This is the high leading the old right now
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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