I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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