I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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