White coat. Heels.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
