Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
