i jhust puked up my retainher.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
