he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
