When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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