Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Slut skills are useful in every country.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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