NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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