i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
