Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
