The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
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