Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Randomize
