So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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