If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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