you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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