Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize