Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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