It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
