I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
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