If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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