i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
