You just made me feel so damn special
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
