i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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