i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
