I want to stick my p in your. b.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
