Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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