Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
