he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
