I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
