dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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