I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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