I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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