piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize