Umm I'm too high to move.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
