Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Randomize
