i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
