I molested 6 butterflies tonight
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
