when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
