i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
