Duck Duck Cougar?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
