the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize