He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Randomize