He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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