WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
