My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
