I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize