Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize