Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
How does it feel to date your dad?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
