Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
